How To Deal With Negative People

By June 24, 2011 10 Comments

I posed the question to my Fit Fun Bootcampers yesterday, “how do you deal with negative people in your life?”

I got a lot of great responses and I wanted to share with you a few of them combined with my own strategies.

I realize this doesn’t have to do with fitness, but it has all to do with quality of life and happiness of life.  The less time you can spend with negative people and listening to negative media, the far better off you will be and the happier you will be.

So here are some ideas

1.  This is pretty obvious, but get them out of your life.  If they are people that you can easily avoid, that would be the easiest solution to the problem.  Unfortunately, many of them are your family members, coworkers, or someone you have to see on a regular basis.  It makes it much tougher then.  If it is someone at work, you can maybe try to work slightly different hours, find another place within the company to work from, or keep your door shut when they are around.

2.  Kill them with kindness.  Negative people have a hard time being around positive people, just like water and oil don’t do well together.  So when they are complaining about something, in a sweet tone, point out a positive that you see from the situation.  If someone is being negative towards you, smile and give them a compliment.  Then later on in the day, go out of your way to do something nice for them.  Maybe is it buying them lunch, bringing them their favorite coffee (although I don’t really endorse coffee much), or send them an article or funny video via email.  This will either make the person be less negative towards you, or it will cause them to not want to hang out with you.  Either way a win.

3.  Tell yourself it isn’t your fault.  Many times someone will lash out at you for something you did or did not do.  Don’t take it personal, most of the time they are dealing with other issues and it just so happened they let it out on you.  Realize it is their problem and not your own.  Smile and walk away.

4.  Try to be positive as much as possible.  This is similar to #2, but do your best to be upbeat and not let negative things come out of your mouth.  We all have our moments, I am guilty as anyone, of saying negative things, but if we consistently can stay positive, those who are more negative will leave us alone or maybe not complain quite so much.

5.  This isn’t my favorite, but sometimes kindly letting them know that it is their choice to think a certain way and show them how just looking at the situation a little differently can bring out a positive.

I am curious… How do you handle negative people in your life?  Please share some strategies to help us out.